BREAKING NEWS WITH
FUCKO McNALLY - MEDIA INSIDER
FUCKO McNALLY - MEDIA INSIDER
3rd April 2005
TOPLESS PHOTOS OF CHARLOTTE CHURCH CAUSE FUSS
CHARLOTTE CHURCH has been yacking on about some
photo she took of herself posing NUDE for the
camera in her mobile phone. Apparently the PHOTO
has been stolen. As you can see from this
REPRODUCTION OF THE PHOTO, she is indeed 100%
TOPLESS.
CHARLOTTE CHURCH has been yacking on about some
photo she took of herself posing NUDE for the
camera in her mobile phone. Apparently the PHOTO
has been stolen. As you can see from this
REPRODUCTION OF THE PHOTO, she is indeed 100%
TOPLESS.
SCARLET JOHANSSON MARRIES D.W GRIFFITH
Scarlet Johansson, star of several MOVIES including
the thing with THORA BIRCH and the one with HIM OUT
CADDYSHACK has stunned FILTHY FUCKING GOSSIP
COLUMNISTS by marrying long-deceased Hollywood Icon
and Racist Old Fucker D.W Griffith.
Griffith died in July 1948, and is the youngest man
Johansson has been linked with thus-far. “I just
admired his insight, his creativity, his deadness.”
Griffith, the man Barry Norman credits with
“INVENTING THE GRAMMAR OF CINEMA” is, nonetheless,
“A STINKING OLD FUCKER” according to Insiders.
HARRY KNOWLES TO DIRECT STAR WARS 7
HARRY KNOWLES, red headed malcontent behind popular
internet movie site AINT IT THE COOL NEWS has been
signed on to direct STAR WARS 7, detailing all
about SPACE and the WARS going on therein.
George Lucas claimed KNOWLES was obviously the
PERFECT CHOICE since Lucas himself couldn’t give a
shit about the stupid old wank anyway. “IT’S A
BUNCH OF WANK” says Lucas, allegedly. “I’d sooner
stick EWAN MCGREGOR UP MY ARSE than watch him
prance around in a dress for another second.”
Fucko McNally SIGNING OFF YOU FUCKER
Scarlet Johansson, star of several MOVIES including
the thing with THORA BIRCH and the one with HIM OUT
CADDYSHACK has stunned FILTHY FUCKING GOSSIP
COLUMNISTS by marrying long-deceased Hollywood Icon
and Racist Old Fucker D.W Griffith.
Griffith died in July 1948, and is the youngest man
Johansson has been linked with thus-far. “I just
admired his insight, his creativity, his deadness.”
Griffith, the man Barry Norman credits with
“INVENTING THE GRAMMAR OF CINEMA” is, nonetheless,
“A STINKING OLD FUCKER” according to Insiders.
HARRY KNOWLES TO DIRECT STAR WARS 7
HARRY KNOWLES, red headed malcontent behind popular
internet movie site AINT IT THE COOL NEWS has been
signed on to direct STAR WARS 7, detailing all
about SPACE and the WARS going on therein.
George Lucas claimed KNOWLES was obviously the
PERFECT CHOICE since Lucas himself couldn’t give a
shit about the stupid old wank anyway. “IT’S A
BUNCH OF WANK” says Lucas, allegedly. “I’d sooner
stick EWAN MCGREGOR UP MY ARSE than watch him
prance around in a dress for another second.”
Fucko McNally SIGNING OFF YOU FUCKER
8th March 2005
Can’t talk long… fucking studio’s sniffing like I
had forty ounces of SKAG shoved into my COCK-KNOB.
I can tell you this shit here though, and if you
tell anyone, I SWEAR TO FUCK I’LL EAT YOUR FACE.
“I ATE BONO’S NUTS” SAYS WINNER
First off, MICHAEL WINNER shocked the MOLTEN FUCK
out of everyone this weekend, Insiders say, by
announcing that four years ago he ATE BONO’S
TESTICLES. The U2 frontman and peace-keeper had
reported the bollocks missing four years to the day
previous to Winner’s announcement. The DEATH WISH
helmer was said to be HUNGRY AS FUCK, and on the
look-out for some more ROCK STAR BALLS he could
EAT. Keith Richards from out The Beatles has locked
himself in a room so as Winner can’t touch his NUTS.
If anyone knows I told you I’ll be in DEEP SHIT.
“KANE WAS SHITE” SAYS ORSON WELLES, DECEASED.
ORSON WELLES has allegedly announced, via SATELLITE
LINK-UP and OUIJA BOARD that CITIZEN KANE, which
many regard as FUCKING GREAT, was in fact “THE
WORST THING I COULD POSSIBLY HAVE DONE, EXCEPT FOR
SHITTING ON MY MOTHER’S HEAD.” Welles mocked
accusations of the film’s worth as “SLANDEROUS PISH
FIT ONLY FOR THE LASH”.
You didn’t hear NOTHING and you heard it here FIRST.
STAR WAS EPISODE III REVIEW LEAKED FROM SOURCE’S
EARS
A LUCASFILM Insider has had his head HACKED INTO by
movie pirates seeking to uncover sketchy, illegible
opinions regarding STAR WARS 3. According to
Insiders, the other Insider has deemed the film
“Alright, bit shit in the middle.” George Lucas is
said to be beside himself with SHEER FUCKING
APATHY. A third group of Insiders mocked the
opinions of the first Insider, but agreed with the
opinions of the second, who had yet to form an
opinion one way or the other.
I’LL BREAK YOUR LEGS IF THIS GETS OUT.
VINCENT PRICE FOUND DEAD
Hollywood today mourns the passing of SCREAM-KING
Vincent Price, who was discovered dead in his grave
over the weekend. “It came as such a shock” said
JULIA ROBERTS. “He was so full of life.”
OK, I gotta go. I can smell the heat on me, THE
FUCKING HEAT.
If you use this, call me FUCKO McNALLY
had forty ounces of SKAG shoved into my COCK-KNOB.
I can tell you this shit here though, and if you
tell anyone, I SWEAR TO FUCK I’LL EAT YOUR FACE.
“I ATE BONO’S NUTS” SAYS WINNER
First off, MICHAEL WINNER shocked the MOLTEN FUCK
out of everyone this weekend, Insiders say, by
announcing that four years ago he ATE BONO’S
TESTICLES. The U2 frontman and peace-keeper had
reported the bollocks missing four years to the day
previous to Winner’s announcement. The DEATH WISH
helmer was said to be HUNGRY AS FUCK, and on the
look-out for some more ROCK STAR BALLS he could
EAT. Keith Richards from out The Beatles has locked
himself in a room so as Winner can’t touch his NUTS.
If anyone knows I told you I’ll be in DEEP SHIT.
“KANE WAS SHITE” SAYS ORSON WELLES, DECEASED.
ORSON WELLES has allegedly announced, via SATELLITE
LINK-UP and OUIJA BOARD that CITIZEN KANE, which
many regard as FUCKING GREAT, was in fact “THE
WORST THING I COULD POSSIBLY HAVE DONE, EXCEPT FOR
SHITTING ON MY MOTHER’S HEAD.” Welles mocked
accusations of the film’s worth as “SLANDEROUS PISH
FIT ONLY FOR THE LASH”.
You didn’t hear NOTHING and you heard it here FIRST.
STAR WAS EPISODE III REVIEW LEAKED FROM SOURCE’S
EARS
A LUCASFILM Insider has had his head HACKED INTO by
movie pirates seeking to uncover sketchy, illegible
opinions regarding STAR WARS 3. According to
Insiders, the other Insider has deemed the film
“Alright, bit shit in the middle.” George Lucas is
said to be beside himself with SHEER FUCKING
APATHY. A third group of Insiders mocked the
opinions of the first Insider, but agreed with the
opinions of the second, who had yet to form an
opinion one way or the other.
I’LL BREAK YOUR LEGS IF THIS GETS OUT.
VINCENT PRICE FOUND DEAD
Hollywood today mourns the passing of SCREAM-KING
Vincent Price, who was discovered dead in his grave
over the weekend. “It came as such a shock” said
JULIA ROBERTS. “He was so full of life.”
OK, I gotta go. I can smell the heat on me, THE
FUCKING HEAT.
If you use this, call me FUCKO McNALLY
